“…things that make you go boom…”

This is Acheron chiming in from some distant orbit. Just wrestled the communicator off of my co-pilot, who is now going to focus on flying! Moving on…

This post is a little bit of general gaming joy and a little bit of Star Citizen (I’m just one gamer! I have many needs!) if you can’t wait to read my Star Citizen ramblings and hopes for the small canisters of mayhem filled joy then scroll on down! But now…

I saw a great little Tweet from Lethality with a picture of theSC_EXP grenades for Star Citizen – he said something very ‘on-point’,

“Even the things we’re going to be throwing away to explode in FPS are ridiculously detailed….”

Lethality is right, it will be a shame to blow up such a well designed, textured and rendered object. This got me think about other grenades in gaming that were so cool it was a shame to see them go; from the wonderful to the classic!

Halo – A Nostalgic Pop

The first one on our list is a little different from the rest, because it is slightly unremarkable. It made it in here because it is a great throwback of a grenade in my opinion, that was hurled at numerous Gruntlings, Jackals and Brutes.

The Mk 9 was that wonderful G.I. green grenade that never really changed Halo_M9throughout the series, which reminded you that despite the plasma swords and Halo Stations, we were dirty, gritty humans at heart. The Mk 9 was at it’s most fun when everything was set on easy and it dispersed gruntlings like the worms they were, up until legendary, when it was about as effective as an Autumn leaf flapping against the back of an elephant. This nade was basic, it was ours, it exploded; that’s all we wanted and we were happy to find them along our way…normally from that dead Marine whose gun you took because of ‘reasons’.

The plasma grenade pulls us more into the realm of the too pretty to detonate, and for obvious reasons. Criticize the Covenant as much as you will, but they made some beautiful death machines (I’m looking at you Banshee) and the plasma grenade is no different. From it’s pearlescent purple body, to the glow of it charged in your hand, and the satisfying Halo_Plasmafear it gave to a soon to be plasmarised enemy. In a way though, the sticky nature of this grenade, and the pretty blue flash, made it all the more pleasing to send to its demise. We salute you plasma grenade, as long as you are safely in the hands of The Chief.

 

Borderlands 2 – The Wonderfully Absurd

It’s no secret to the gaming community that the Borderlands series is the perfect study into the absurd. Famed for it’s comic characters, Borderlands_Longbowextraordinary animals, psychotic enemies and perfectly particular weapons. I sunk numerous hours into the Borderlands games, particularly Borderlands 2, and a lot of that drive came about from collecting it’s array of ridiculous weapons. None of these were more chaotically cool than the grenades, whose designer deserves a slap on the back (and continued employment wherever they seek it). From the rather sweet look Longbow to the heroic Red Army Fireburst; incinerate on Comrade. The Longbow’s subtle, almost My Little Pony-esque colorBorderlands_Commie scheme doesn’t betray the cool Sci-fi look and the incineration that follows it’s “click”. Nothing can really be added about the Fireburst that is different to any other incendiary grenade. But it had a hammer and sickle on the side, and it was there to make a statement. It did that.

These grenades each had so much character, and bewildering destructive force, it was of course a joy and a crime to pull those pins; none more so than my favorite, the enigmatic and Sci-Fi or Die Borderlands_QuasarQuasar grenade. It packed a singularity punch, and did it in style. Rock on Borderlands, you did it right.

Can’t Fallout with this one…

This had to be one of my favorite things in Fallout 4, no, it honestly was. Screw the dynamic storyline and the allure of bagging Deathclaws. I want my Baseball grenade and I want it now! This is a fantastic idea that so perfectly matched the ramshackle, makeshift Fallout world; needless to say this was a homerun, they hit it outta the ball park…there was no foul FO4_Baseballball here. Ahem. It is a lovely little addition, although I feel with it being so singular there should have been an animation to allow you to hit it with a baseball bat if you had one in your inventory, just my thoughts on the matter (this is when I find out you could totally do that) But – enjoy a video of explosive baseball hilarity here!

 

The Stellar Finale

Don’t worry Star Citizens, I didn’t forget about you. Trawling through to get to the SC content on this Citizen’s blog… well I may waffle on about other games too – but we’ve all had past lovers. But, none so lovely as those nades created by the enigmatic Ze’ev Harris. It was actually hard not to just dump the whole album of images from Ze’ev’s ArtStation, but what we have here is stunning.

Firstly the fragmentation grenade, or what I assume is the fragmentation grenade (it has that frag look) – the whole compact design, and painted SC_EXP.jpgG.I. look, reminiscent of the Mk 9 from Halo, is classic. I can see these jangling from the suit of a pirate, I can see them laying about an armory, the paint on them scuffed, but the explosion in them deadly. These grenades of course are the only ones I haven’t virtually thrown, although we have seen the EMP explode (this is still considered a spoiler from the infamous leak, you are warned) – perfect segway…

…into the EMP grenade. I think the defining coolness from these designs is their detailed simplicity, which must be a SC_EMP_Singular.jpgself contradiction. Moving forward; the benefit of having kept everything clean and simple is that a lot of work has gone into making the little things count – the flip catch to reveal the detonator, the painted lettering on the side, even the dividing lines showing the different segments of the grenade. All of it adds to my watchword of immersion and reality, among all this virtual fiction.

I really hope that CIG put effort into the grenade animations, possibly randomizing a few different methods of deploying them based on the environment logic calculations they have worked on: the same logic calculations that dictate whether to get in and exit your ship with haste, or not, based on whether there are active dangers and threats. I would love to see the player roll a grenade along the floor if they are being stealthy, and lobbing it with all their might if all hell is breaking loose. But I may be entering the realms of fantasy, and hypothesis.

Thank you, this has been Acheron’s Transmission –

“…in the bleak moment after hearing the pin drop, and seeing the grenade roll to their feet, the Citizen hoped their descendant wouldn’t make the same mistake they did…”

 

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